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The short version: I was going to be featured on my very own official Topps trading card, but then MLB put the kibosh on that, so I decided to make my own card instead — and it turned out great! (For the long version, look here.)

The artwork and design are by the amazing Rob Ullman. Each card is shipped in a plastic “penny sleeve” and then in a green-bordered “toploader” (two terms I wasn’t familiar with until working on this project):

In addition, each card comes with a 7/8″ square piece of the Uni Watch Tequila Sunrise Deluxe shirt that I was wearing for the Topps photo — the same photo that the card illustration is based on. So every card will be a relic card, and the relic will represent the overall experience of getting to have my own Topps card, then having that opportunity taken away, and then creating this new card in its place:

There are also 11 autographed cards — 10 signed in green ink and one in purple — randomly distributed throughout the set, so you could end up with one of those:

Ready to order? Here’s how:

• For one card or two cards, the price is $5.99 per card plus $1 for shipping. Update: Price now reduced to $3.99 for the first card, $2.99 for the second card, plus $1 for shipping.

• For more than two cards, the price is $3.99 for the first card, $2.99 for each additional card, plus $5 for shipping. (That’s because anything more than two cards will need to be shipped in a bubble mailer at the package rate.)

• Please don’t offer to pay extra in order to get one of the signed cards — those will just come up randomly, and I’m not going to accept a higher price for them.

• Tally up the total for your purchase and then send me the proper amount via Venmo (use @Paul-Lukas-2 as the payee), Zelle (, or Google Pay ( If you’d rather use Apple Pay or a paper check, contact me and I’ll give you the info you need. Sorry, no PayPal.

• After sending payment, email me with your mailing address.

• If you’re outside of the USA, contact me so I can calculate the shipping charge and arrange an alternate form of payment for you.

• If you want to combine a trading card purchase with an order for a Uni Watch koozie, a seam ripper, a magnet, or a chain-stitched patch, please email me and I’ll give you a price that includes a combined shipping fee for the whole shebang. (Sorry, these are the only Uni Watch items I can combine into one shipment, because all our other items ship from separate locations.)