Tales Of Over-Accessorization: Carlos Guillen

What’s strechy tape? is that like pre-wrap?
And doesn’t look too bad too me, kinda like the new long pants/wristbands/sleeves/necklaces/sunglasses look:)

Ridiculous….give me the “good ol’ days when ballplayers didn’t wear jewelry, lacked batting gloves, showed stirrups, played in the daytime, had names like Johnson, Wagner, Cobb, Ruth, Young, Williams, Musial, Mantle, Brock, Koufax…ah yes…when it was a game…!!!

Titanium, feh. When accessories are made of plutonium, then it’s time to be concerned.

[quote comment=”235799″]Maybe Stern needs to take over baseball and put in a dress code there too. You know he would make stirrups manditory. And remind me never to shake Alou’s hand. Yikes.[/quote]
Uh…don’t you mean SELIG?

I can vouch for the titanium sleeve. It definitely helps my elbow during the 4-beer-league-softball-teams-at-once season.

[quote comment=”235844″][quote comment=”235799″]Maybe Stern needs to take over baseball and put in a dress code there too. You know he would make stirrups manditory. And remind me never to shake Alou’s hand. Yikes.[/quote]
Uh…don’t you mean SELIG?[/quote]
No, I’m saying Stern should become the commish of the MLB too. He’s the best commissioner of any league right now and seems to care about the image of his league.

[quote comment=”235852″]Blackhawks retire Bobby Hull and Stan Mikita’s number last night. the 2 player wore the new rbk edge jerseys
link

I’m a hawks fan, and I love Hull and Mikita, but I do believe their numbers were already hanging in the rafters. Hull’s was retired in ’83 and Mikita in ’80. Seems redundant.

Found this quote in link article, which basically sums up the ceremony and circumstances.

“Rocky Wirtz was cheered by a sellout crowd when he introduced Hull and Mikita from centre ice. The last time William Wirtz stepped on to the United Center ice – during a 1998 ceremony to retire current coach Denis Savard’s number – the crowd booed so loudly that Wirtz couldn’t be heard on the building’s public address system.”

Pretty funny stuff. Although, if you are going to do a profile of every MLB player who over-accessorized, then Paul should just take a year vacation.

Well spring training is the time to try new things. Hopefully he’ll look in the mirror/see himself in a picture and realize how cool he looks

[quote comment=”235818″]Bryan, any pictures showing his entire glove? – I bet it isn’t anything understated.

And perhaps he had knee problems from trying to lug around all that extra crap.[/quote]

now that he’s apparently too immobile to play short anymore, link

and i too love the sunglasses on the cap look…WTF?

[quote comment=”235895″][quote comment=”235848″]Bryan is an angry young man. I suppose everyone should go around looking the same like robots.[/quote]

Dude, if you want to look for robots, check out the guy with the titanium elbows and two pounds of metal around his neck.[/quote]

And not look in the robot leauge of link

Joking aside, I think that, while busy, the level of clutter isn’t so bad on him. The necklaces may be a bit much, yes, but I don’t have any objection to the arm braces.

Interesting note at the end of the latest entry on this link. Kevin Dipietro, equipment “guru” of the Toronto Raptors was named MLSE employee of the month.

nice link of some interesting sports superstitions. not all uni related, but a good read regardless

Georgetown is wearing their new SODs today… Doesn’t look all that different from their normal jerseys and you can’t really notice the difference except for the lack of shoulder stripe and the piping that runs down the back. Also, Roy Hibbert normally wears an undershirt that goes all the way down to his elbow but today… no undershirt. Sorry for no screen grab.

Do people actually have to criticize Bryan? Am I the only one who gets the tongue in cheek humor behind this, or am I missing something?

g-town in their new SOD unis today. i feel left out that my school doesn’t have them. nike is a bunch of meanies.

[quote comment=”235866″]Gotta support Carlos on this. All of his accessories have a high “CDI” (Chicks Dig It) factor.[/quote]

The above statement is ridiculous. First, no girls dig chewing tobacco. Second, he looks like a moron. I will forgive him the titanium, because everyone can’t be a good ballplayer and have the brains to avoid getting ripoffed by voodoo medicine. The pre-wrap wrist bands deserve no excuses, they are an eyesore.

No wonder he had t move from shortstop to firstbase, no one can actually field with all of that garbage on.

[quote comment=”236107″]g-town in their new SOD unis today. i feel left out that my school doesn’t have them. nike is a bunch of meanies.[/quote]

How do you think I feel? I went to George Mason. Nike is SUPPOSED to make all their Final Four schools an “Elite” school and nothing has happened. They have stock Nike jerseys (any high school coach can buy online), heck, they don’t even use Nike basketballs. I guess Nike only grants “Elite” status to schools who have been to a Final Four AND is a major school. It’s a real slap in the face to the mid-majors. It’s why I don’t buy Nikes. (not to mention their basketball shoes fall apart).

sorry 62 chile, forgive me heads

[quote comment=”236247″]bryan’s a jokester, of course; but i like the comment by user who points out the ridiculous biking hobby. few things get my goat more than seeing these weekday jan ullrich’s out there. unless you’re actually in a, you know, race, you probably don’t need special shoes to clip to your pedals, or skintight aerodynamic gear.

i’m not down on bicycling at all. i ride every day, to and from work, the store et c. but i also rode from NYC to montauk in one day wearing naught but adidas sneaks (1967 chile), corduroys and a three-quarter sleeve t. i laugh when i see clowns (good word) in their touring getups trying to stuff in their weekly fitness or love of the road or whatnot. they’re as bad as the dolts who drive to work every day, then waste money on a gym membership. bicycles are transportation, not excuses to collect “components.”

if you don’t want your cuff caught in the chain, roll it up.[/quote]
But do you think its ridiculous when grown men put on full hockey gear for a rec league game? Or tennis players wick-away shirts while playing at the local club?

The point of biking equipment is to help improve the ride and make the rider better, I honestly can’t believe you would have a problem with them…seems like your just trying to find away to insult Bryan.

No, I don’t think that’s it. Unless you’re going to race, why wear those things? In an adult Rec leage hockey game, it’s till competitive- as in, you’re playing against other people. Same with the tennis wicking shirt. And in the case of the hockey gear, it’s protective.

nididakes is saying (I think) that if you’re not actually competing, it’s pointless. If you’re biking just for a workout, you don’t need to wear the entire getup and use all the extra gadgets and such that you only need if you’re racing.

Answer me this, Bryan. Why post on a blog if you can’t take valid criticism and criticize how others express themselves? My comment that was deleted was not out of line.

Guillen chooses to express himself in this way, and I applaud it. It is different. It is part of him and possibly part of his culture.

Because you don’t understand it or like it, you criticize it.

Well I don’t like that you criticize it, so I feel I should be able to criticize you just as you are free to criticize my point of view. I believe your posts often come across as snarky and a little mean-spirited.

Bryan, I appreciate that you work very hard at your sport and that your uniform is justified by your being a member of a competetive cycling team.

I’ll bet that even you, though, have a good chuckle when you see a weekend rider out there wearing a full Rabobank or CSC kit, especially when the jersey is stretched to the limit by a healthy gut.

[quote comment=”236225″][quote comment=”236107″]g-town in their new SOD unis today. i feel left out that my school doesn’t have them. nike is a bunch of meanies.[/quote]

How do you think I feel? I went to George Mason. Nike is SUPPOSED to make all their Final Four schools an “Elite” school and nothing has happened. They have stock Nike jerseys (any high school coach can buy online), heck, they don’t even use Nike basketballs. I guess Nike only grants “Elite” status to schools who have been to a Final Four AND is a major school. It’s a real slap in the face to the mid-majors. It’s why I don’t buy Nikes. (not to mention their basketball shoes fall apart).[/quote]

i went to UVA – i’m sort of joking about not having the SOD for my beloved wahoos, but i’d love to see what they’d look like. would nike put “wahoos” on the jersey? i think that would be phenomenal. or even seeing “cavaliers” would be cool. anyone out there have a template for SOD jerseys? my skills aren’t up to par – i.e., i suck at photoshop.

link is a good shot of Georgetown’s System of Dress Uniforms. They look pretty solid to me.

Carolina appears to be wearing a memorial patch for their slain Student Body President, Eve Carson. Black circle with white “EVE” lettering.

Also, everyone in the crowd at Cameron is wearing Carolina blue and white ribbons.

[quote comment=”236372″]UNC has EVE patches to honor slain student body president Eve Carson.[/quote]
[quote comment=”236373″]Carolina appears to be wearing a memorial patch for their slain Student Body President, Eve Carson. Black circle with white “EVE” lettering.

Also, everyone in the crowd at Cameron is wearing Carolina blue and white ribbons.[/quote]

link

[quote comment=”236392″][quote comment=”236372″]UNC has EVE patches to honor slain student body president Eve Carson.[/quote]
[quote comment=”236373″]Carolina appears to be wearing a memorial patch for their slain Student Body President, Eve Carson. Black circle with white “EVE” lettering.

Also, everyone in the crowd at Cameron is wearing Carolina blue and white ribbons.[/quote]

link[/quote]
Ah, so the lettering was Carolina Blue. My bad.

I was at that Blackhawks game last night (just strolled back to Milwaukee from Chicago a little while ago) and I have to say I’m not sure what the impetus was behind it. I bought the tickets for my boyfriend for Valentine’s Day and at the time of purchase, no special event was listed. There was no mention of it on that day on the schedule or the promotions schedule.

So I was surprised when I went on to the Hawks website Friday morning to check the rosters and saw information about the tribute.

My guess is that interest in the team and ticket sales were lagging and these guys are 2 of the most beloved of all Blackhawks, so they brought them in and packed the place to the rafters.

It’s late and it’s been a long whirlwind weekend, so my brain might be a little sluggish, but as far as I can see, there is no anniversary or reason for it.

That being said, there were more Mikita jerseys walking around that place than anyone else.

I have a few uni-related observations that I’ll be emailing to Paul after I get some sleep and if they don’t make the ticker, I’ll pass them along in comments.

[quote comment=”236420″][quote comment=”236330″][quote comment=”236327″]Answer me this, Bryan. Why post on a blog if you can’t take valid criticism and criticize how others express themselves? My comment that was deleted was not out of line.

Guillen chooses to express himself in this way, and I applaud it. It is different. It is part of him and possibly part of his culture.

Because you don’t understand it or like it, you criticize it.

Well I don’t like that you criticize it, so I feel I should be able to criticize you just as you are free to criticize my point of view. I believe your posts often come across as snarky and a little mean-spirited.[/quote]

Dude, I haven’t deleted anything. I just got here. But I fail to see how titanium sleeves are a part of anybody’s culture.[/quote]

For the record: I’m the one who deleted that post, because it was just too pathetic.

Yes, Bryan’s posts are sometimes snarky. And what exactly is the problem with that? If you don’t like it, go read something else instead of picking on the substitute teacher. Jeez.[/quote]
Now I’m wondering when Mr. Redemske became the sub around here. Silver medal, check? I think so…

I was watching the Cubs/Diamondbacks Spring Training game today (FINALLY! Baseball’s back!) and noticed something a little odd in one of the late innings. One of the late inning subs for the Cubs, wearing a high number and no name on his back (aka no chance of making the big club), was also wearing an adjustable cap. That stuck me as a little odd. In most Spring Training games, you’ll see guys with crappy high numbers and no name (while most other guys have names and their regular number), but you rarely see the adjustable cap.

[quote comment=”236417″]I was at that Blackhawks game last night (just strolled back to Milwaukee from Chicago a little while ago) and I have to say I’m not sure what the impetus was behind it. I bought the tickets for my boyfriend for Valentine’s Day and at the time of purchase, no special event was listed. There was no mention of it on that day on the schedule or the promotions schedule.

So I was surprised when I went on to the Hawks website Friday morning to check the rosters and saw information about the tribute.

My guess is that interest in the team and ticket sales were lagging and these guys are 2 of the most beloved of all Blackhawks, so they brought them in and packed the place to the rafters.

It’s late and it’s been a long whirlwind weekend, so my brain might be a little sluggish, but as far as I can see, there is no anniversary or reason for it.

That being said, there were more Mikita jerseys walking around that place than anyone else.

I have a few uni-related observations that I’ll be emailing to Paul after I get some sleep and if they don’t make the ticker, I’ll pass them along in comments.[/quote]

It seems that the ‘Hawks honored Hull and Mikita last night as a way of reconnecting with the fan base. The organization has basically treated both the former greats and the fans like garbage over the years. For example they didn’t sign Brett Hull because it would have meant that Bobby Hull would’ve been around the team. Most famously the team refused to broadcast home games on TV. This has been recently rectified by the new chairman, a fact which was repeatedly mentioned last night. Its definitely odd to see something like this, but I see it as the organization paying some back taxes to the fans and players.

Bryan, Do you always cause problems (j/k) or does it just seem to find link.

Keep up the good work.

This post is doesn’t know what it’s about.

The headline proclaims that the post is about over-accessorized players. The text picks up a completely dead-horse thread about performance enhancers.

Bryan lists six items that either show that Carlos is over-accessorized, or “enhancing his performance” or both. It’s unclear which of these ideas really structures the post.

As Matt pointed out in post 31, the source of the humor here really isn’t the number of superfluous accessories Guillen has on. (One infers that a player is OVER-accessorized when he wears accessories that exceed his needs.)

The hat is needful because it is part of the uniform and is only brought in unde the performance-enhancement concept. The tape is likely needful because of an injury. The carcinogenic dip does not fit the “performance enhancement” concept and isn’t conspicuously needless because it’s so widely used in baseball. This group of three is unremarkable and would not have earned mention if found without the other three items.

The item about eyewear is funny, but falls under the “over-accessorized” concept rather than the “performance-enhancement” one. The joke is about how they exceed reasonable needs rather than how they confer some special benefit. So again, we’re switching between concepts.

The crosses and sleeves are treated as performance enhancers in a problematic way. The item abut the sleeves is syntactically ambiguous. Bryan writes: “And you thought the necklaces were dumb.”

1. Is Bryan talking about Titanium necklaces, like the ones on TV? If so, it actually makes more sense to put titanium on your arms than around your neck because your arms are more involved in throwing the ball and swinging the bat. (Of course, whether titanium confers any benefit at all is a separate question.)

2. Is Bryan talking about the cross necklaces from the previous item? If so, Bryan is belittling a personal religious observation by comparing it to a sham pseudo-science and I find that offensive. Cross necklaces, broadly speaking, are neither sold nor worn as talismanic charms. Bryan is clearly trying to drag up the “Performance Enhancement” thread that he drops elsewhere, but even so, I’d like Bryan to explain what about cross necklaces is “dumb” if that’s what he’s referring to. That remark is not mandated by the performance-enhancement concept.

That previous item, which specifically treats the cross necklaces, seems to corroborate the second of these interpretations. It also shows again how Bryan can’t stay clear on what he’s writing about.

What I perceive as the source of the humor about the necklaces is that there are so many of them and that, as a group, they look like they’d be unnecessarily heavy and cumbersome for someone involved in an athletic endeavor. This easily and inoffensively fits into the “over-accessorized” concept.

Instead, Bryan targets the necklaces’ religious function as performance-enhancing: “When the final hour approaches, the deity in charge won’t have any trouble finding Carlos.” Carlos is, one hopes, nowhere near his final hour in this photo, so that’s inapposite.

Bryan’s subsequent riffing about combining the titanium’s putative healing powers with those of the cross continues to debase the cross symbol as a trinket and a pseudo-scientific talismanic trinket for the gullible.

He conflates the cross with Jesus the person even though I don’t perceive a crucifix on any of Guillen’s necklaces and that’s not mandated by the performance-enhancement concept. Also, I find it offensive. He could have avoided this if he’d stuck with the titular “over-accessorized” concept and joked about how numerous and heavy the necklaces seem. But I’m still not clear exactly what the overriding concept was here.

hey, those Phiten sleeves actually work.. i play link and i found that those sleeves keep the blood flowing in my arm really nicely. it opens up the capillaries or something really cool like that.